Spectator or Player

Hello,

Ever wondered while watching a game if you could have been playing the sport. Or you could have been dancing there, for that matter said something that another person managed to say. Thats the spectator frame of mind, wanting to be a player. Not wanting to sound too philosophical but my take is that most of takes turns at being a spectator and player through the couse of our lives. Some of us are more consistent with the roles we taken on in particular parts of our lives. Some take the lead in social issues, while some in professional. But most of us go through phases of being either.

At the moment, I think I am happy being a spectator, albeit an active one at that. For one being a spectator allows you to think about the game in a bigger picture, and lets you get perspective. In contrast to be ing a player, where you are really into the game, thinking what to do next, and what the other players are going to do next. I can quite easily claim that I thrive on being a player, being in the middle of action, taking everything thrown at me as something I need to deal with and make a score.

But being a spectator, just lets me see what as a player I could have done, and can do. It doesnt provide the thrill of being alive, but it certainly reiterates the power of thinking, of analysing and the sheer sense of comprehending oneself.

Hmm.. am sure that has been heavy enough to read. On a lighter side, none of this is actually driven by anythign in particular. Just wanted to feel normal when things seem to be abnormal. Want to rejuvenate my passion for life and the beauty it embodies. Its within grasp and yet the effort seems so huge. And not even sure if an effort will allow me to grasp it, probably need more than just an effort. Need that something extra.

The thing we call - the human spirit. that which manifests as Hope, that which rises as curiosity, that which occurs as determination. Extra could never be enough and so it remains suspended between our will and experience. And so long as we try, it shall be ours to name.

so much for a musings of a quiet evening.

cheers,
satish